Do it all differently??

With the coming of the New Year, I've pondered a lot lately if there was anything in my life that I would change.  There are a lot of things that I wish that I wish I would've done differently in my life, but knowing that if I would've chosen that path, I would be in a totally different place than I am now, with different friends, and a different relationship status.  I love my wife, and daughter, and I love my friends and I'm glad that they have been such an instrumental part of my life, but with that being said, I want to mention a few things that I would choose differently.

Knowing what I know now, growing up I would live my life less scared to mess up.  I was always scared of letting people down, or making a mistake.  I was afraid of committing an unpardonable sin, and I hate that I felt that way about my relationship with God through Jesus.  I wish that I held on to the idea and knowledge of grace, rather than the fear of wrath and punishment.  More risks, less fear.

I would've stuck with my original idea of what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I was very interested in psychology, and being a psychologist.(considering that I am going into counseling now, which is a similar field)  I would've graduated with the knowledge of what I wanted to do with my life, and had a plan.  I also wish I would've went to a larger school(preferably Duke).  I loved the time I spent at my school, and I love the friends and experience that I had  there as well, but I feel sometimes that I would've gotten more exposed to the world as it is at a larger school rather than being shletered from things and being scared to get to know people who were "worldly".  Perhaps that was more of a "me" issue than a school issue though.

Thankfully, I can't change anything.  I would not have the lessons that I've learned, and the friends that I have, and the wife and daughter who love me no matter how many dumb decisions I make.  I'm thankful for the road that I've travelled, and the road that is yet to come.